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You can create everything from the space of Shunya. It’s not at all about status, it’s about trusting yourself that you can create from nothing.

We have evolved in this era of fast-forward drive, often forgetting where we came from. What was our existence and how have we lived? We follow the race track assuming we are moving ahead, but we often fall prey to moving in a rat trap. For whatever we grasp, we hold on to it and continue to exist forgetting our exit.

This time on The xMonks Drive Deepa Natarajan, a PCC, a leader, and a creator joins us to explain how everything can be created from a space of Shunya, How everything comes out of the nothingness. Read this blog to explore Divine appointments and how to create from a space of Shunya. Here is a transcripted version of this conversation.

Upholding values with compassion

Gaurav: So my question is, how do you ensure that you live from a space of compassion and forgiveness, and yet don’t compromise on your values, you don’t compromise on your rights? And I’m also thinking how different people would have managed different leaders worldwide, people like Nelson Mandela, people like Mahatma Gandhi, who choose not to compromise on their core values and get to live their life from a space of compassion and forgiveness.

Deepa: So let me tell you, let’s go back a little bit. Right after that incident, you know, a few weeks and a few months passed by. And I literally felt that I wasn’t being valued for what I bring, right. And I wasn’t bringing out my potential. And so I remember, that was just one day, and this is an accumulation of things. And there was one day when I was walking into the office. And I still remember the doors of the office, when I walked in, it just felt like iron doors and pushed through that. And this was a kind of an illusion, I saw and there was this long corridor with rooms on both sides. And I turned and looked into one room, I saw people sitting and I saw people sitting on toilet seats. Now it was my imagination that was perhaps running wild, of course, people are not sitting on toilet seats. But, at that moment, that’s how it was. And so I said, what’s happening, and I turned and I looked at the other room and I said this is what I see. And then I said, This is what people are doing to me here. And I just touched my face, and I was sweating. I immediately ran to the restroom, wash my face. And that’s when the awakening came from that deep hurt and the deep pain of not being valued, not being identified for what I can bring. That’s when the warrior in me was evoked. 

So, you know, in xMonks, you talk about warriors. And you asked the question to me before in our conversation deeper, when did that warrior in you get installed. And there were several moments in life, there was not just one. So every time we are hurt, every time we experience pain, the war we have a choice. And so we have a choice to evoke that warrior within us all. We have a choice to play by the rules and play a cat on the wall and allow the situation and allow the universe to decide for us. And if we do that, then we choose to be in harmony and we choose to play safe, but we choose not to stand up for ourselves.

Gaurav: Yesterday I was discussing how all of us have a very basic need or have a need to be heard or need to be seen and have a sense of belongingness as I’m just listening to you as you mentioned that you did not feel valued. Somehow I could experience that in my body, I experienced the same emotion that I experienced yesterday when we’re discussing not being seen, not being heard. In that moment when you felt that you’re not being valued. What happened? What shifted for you?

Deepa: We play by the rules because we want to belong. Love and belonging are what we search for all the time. When we choose to be different, when we choose to play a different game, we are going to lose people along the way. When you choose to get out of your comfort zone, and protect your Chateau and protect your castle, and protect your potential, and that evolutionary potential that exists within you. That is when you’re going to create a way for yourself. And as you create a new way for yourself, you’re going to lose people along the way. That is for sure. Because you trigger something in them.

How do we define our Tolerance?

Gaurav: I come across so many women and ladies, who are doing extremely well in their corporate career, and yet, they’re not happy on the personal front. They sort of feel that they carry with themselves, despite the fact that they’re living with so much resentment. And yet, they don’t take the first step. So if you were to hold the space for them, and tell them, or give them a piece of advice here, what are the things that they need to look at? What is the measure of tolerance that they should look for? How would you address this?

Deepa: I think everybody’s definition of a tolerance zone is completely different. The level at which I stepped outside my comfort zone is completely different from what is a comfort zone for someone else. Right! What is the difference? And you’ve got to decide there? How? I don’t think you will ever know how much you’re capable of until you’re in it. I had no clue how life would turn out, I had no clue how many risks I would be taking and where that would lead me to. But when you’re in the situation, you’ve got to trust yourself, that you have all the resources within you to actually come up, come up strongly. It’s a fear that holds us back. Why don’t we set boundaries? Do you know why people don’t set boundaries? We all don’t set boundaries. I never used to set boundaries. Let me talk away other people. Let me talk about myself. I never used to set boundaries. Because I was afraid that people will dislike me. I was afraid that the project might stop I was afraid that the relationship might come to an end. And it was my fear. But the minute I went and tested and I saw that, okay, if I do set my boundaries, yes, it makes the other people upset. But in the long run, it brings you back much more respect.

Values: The energetic Drivers

Deepa: So Gaurav what are values? And how do you define values?

Gaurav: I defined values, it’s a shortcut way of defining what is important to us. They are energetic drivers that define my aspiration and my intentions. And yeah, anything it’s it drives anything that I do or anything that I avoid. So, yeah, how do you define values?

Deepa: A value is for me, A key-value, let me give an example. A key value for me is personal fulfillment. And another key value for me is freedom. And freedom is freedom of expression. Freedom is freedom, to make choices, and freedom to be my own boss. This is how I define freedom. So we all have different notions of how we define that word, you might have a different way of defining freedom, we might say that, okay, we have the same value base, which is different. And this is where we need to look at how do we operationalize that value and that behavior, what does that look like, in the way, I show up at work in the way I show up in my relationship, and that’s when you can actually define your boundaries. So, you know, life just gets easier when you do a little bit of that inner work, because you not only bring clarity for yourself, you also bring clarity for everybody else around you.

About the Speaker

Deepa Natarajan is a PCC and a change leader who understands how to put a strategic and purposeful leadership style into action on a daily basis.”Rethink Leadership Methodology” is her creation. She provides an end-to-end online coaching programme based on the Rethink Leadership Methodology that helps people achieve their vision of success by altering unhelpful behavioral habits assisting people in becoming the leaders they desire with ease and peace of mind. 

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the importance of a space of Shunya?

We’ve progressed in this fast-paced period, frequently forgetting where we came from. What was the nature of our existence and how did we live? We believe we are moving forward by following the race track, yet we are frequently caught in a rat trap. But in reality, everything is born from a space of nothingness, a space of shunya. In clear words, Shunya is zero, which means nothing. So, the truth lies in the fact that everything comes out of Shunya.

How do we define values?

Values are a quick way of defining what’s important to us. They are energizing forces that shape my goals and objectives. And, yes, whatever it is, it is what motivates me to do or avoid certain things.

Who is Deepa Natarajan?

Deepa Natarajan is a PCC and change leader who knows how to implement a strategic and purposeful leadership style on a daily basis.

Her creation is “Rethink Leadership Methodology.” She offers an end-to-end online coaching programme based on the Rethink Leadership Methodology that assists people in becoming the leaders they wish with comfort and peace of mind by changing unhelpful behavioural habits.

What is the measure of tolerance?

A tolerance zone is defined in a completely different way. The degree to which one stepped outside their comfort zone differs greatly from what someone else considers to be a comfortable level. When you’re in a situation like this, you have to believe in yourself and know that you have all you need to come up strong. It’s a fear that prevents us from moving forward.

When does a warrior in you get installed?

Every time we are harmed, every time we are in agony, we have a decision in the conflict. As a result, we have the option of awakening the warrior within each of us. We have a choice to play by the rules and play a cat on the wall and allow the situation and allow the universe to decide for us. And if we do that, we are choosing to live in harmony and to play it safe rather than standing up for ourselves.