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Home » Blog » 5 Deep Insights About How to Transform into Your Extraordinary Self

The search for self begins from the simple question “ Who am I?”  Gaurav Arora in conversation with Bob Anderson in the xMonks Drive Podcast brings forth the spiritual connotation in the process of becoming the self. 

1. Turn inwards

A simple question like, “Who am I?” has the power to turn our world upside down! All religious upbringing has been obliterated by the onus of this question, the searching it inspires. We look for answers outside of ourselves, but we can turn inwards with these three simple terms. It all sounds like no big deal in retrospect. It is astonishing to move from a genuine dualistic religious view of life to an equally genuine non-dualistic spiritual view of life.

2. Suffering shines

Robert Bly says, “men will make their greatest contribution to the community from the wound.” Sharing the views on his process of becoming the person he is, Bob reflects upon some instances from his as well. He quotes that “I am arising in Bob Anderson”. All the suffering in life is because of not knowing your true identity. Until you realize your true Self, you believe yourself to be the name that has been given to you. This statement is so complete in its own beauty. The journey to self is the journey of expansion. You are not who you think you are. You are none of those seemingly defining conditions or states.


3. Non-duality

It’s only the self that goes on a journey of expansion. You go on a journey of development and expanding into higher stages of adult development or consciousness. And, of course all the great spiritual traditions have these journey maps of progressive stages of development. At first, they go ugly. Here’s how the ego evolves and then post egoic, how the ego surrenders into non duality or perhaps even prior to non non duality is unity itself divinity, only one. So, from the perspective of the self, the separate self, it looks like I’m on a journey from the perspective of your supreme identity. You never journeyed.

4. Define yourself

From your birth until now, it includes your experience with your growing, the impressions that others have left on you and your experiences, your present with your mind, your thoughts and feelings today and, of course, your future as well, the hopes, plans and wishes you have. There’s a little more to ‘you’, though, which is much harder to describe in terms. If you really profoundly understand this ‘I’, this little phrase, you know what I mean. The feeling of understanding who you are gives you peace of heart and mind. This understanding is why people have always been advised by spiritual figures, denominations and many people to find the answer to this issue.

5. Find your own answer

However, the truth is that there is nobody who can give you the answer. You may have heard a guru or master tell you they’re going to help you, but the truth is that you have to find your own answer. Since we are all alike, nobody else can tell you who you are. The idea is that whatever you think belongs to you, you will be motivated by it. Whatever you think doesn’t belong to you, you won’t be affected. You are bound from the moment you believe the body to be yours, and when you accept it as alien, then you are free.

More about the guest: Bob Anderson

Robert J. Anderson is the Founder and Chairman of The Leadership Circle and Co-founder and Chairman of the Full Circle Group. Bob has dedicated his career to exploring the connections between leadership, mastery, competence, consciousness, spirituality and business. Bob is the co-author (along with Bill Adams) of the book, Mastering Leadership: An Integrated Framework for Breakthrough Performance and Extraordinary Business Results, which has been described as a seminal work in the leadership field. It was a Top Ten Bestseller on 800ceoread and was a Top 10 editorial pick on Amazon. In 2019, Bob and Bill continued their writing partnership with the release of Scaling Leadership: Building Organizational Capability and Capacity to Create Outcomes that Matter Most.  Bob is a true pioneer in the field of leadership development and research. He spends the majority of his time researching, writing, consulting, and speaking around the world. He is dedicated to impacting the consciousness and effectiveness of leadership globally. Bob’s practical wisdom, humility, creativity, humor, and expertise provide a rare and transformative experience for those with whom he works. Curious to know more about finding yourself, then listen to the full conversation here and stay tuned for more.

Frequently Asked Questions

Define leadership journey?

The Leadership Journey is for someone who, as a leader, needs to enhance their skills and abilities. It is a path taken by a person who has been given the task of guiding individuals to achieve a certain business goal.

How to work on self development?

It is only the self that embarks on a journey of growth. You are going on a journey of self-development and diversifying into higher levels of adult development or awareness.

How can one define self journey?

It’s a process that we all go through, through losses and distress or consciousness and introspection, all the time. From seeing how you react to anything in your life to revealing your meaning and purpose, self-journey can take several different forms

What are the benefits of self transformation?

Self-Transformation helps equip an individual with the abilities to cope with problems, retain contentment, and an optimistic mindset at the workplace, even during challenging periods.

Define spiritual development?

In reality, spiritual development is to believe in something besides the material world and to cultivate an understanding of aspects beyond the limits of spacetime.