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“The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but the thankful heart will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings.” – Henry Ward Beecher

Life as we know it, is chaotic. It will be messy. Sometimes it’s sunny. And some days there are just dark clouds. To deny that life has its share of disappointments, frustrations, losses, hurts, setbacks, and sadness would be unrealistic and untenable.

The next podcast with our guest speaker, Neeta Bhushan with her amicable personality, is taking us on her journey of fighting abuse and growing resilience and grit. 

Here are some life lessons she puts out during the conversation. 

Be Grateful to Everyone

Be grateful to everyone even though we do not appreciate their contributions right away. In our lives, people and circumstances will remind us to catch derangement as neurosis, to see when we are under the covers in our space, to see when we have pulled the curtains, locked the door, and are determined to stay there.

This whole notion of being thankful to everyone and everything at first appears to us to be counterintuitive. We just want to be thankful for the things that feel good, that seem to make us “better.” But what we need to do is switch from the concept of being better to being true, or of improving ourselves. When we feel battered and worn out, we are all at our best, because that is when our indestructible pieces are exposed. For the times and people in our lives who touch our broken-heartedness, we should all feel thankful, because that is how we can be open.

Hold Space for Yourself 

Sometimes living for others can actually backfire. Learning how to hold space for yourself is one of those foundational things you need to be doing in order to be able to live your best life. There are two different parts of this: creating space and holding space. You’ve got to be doing both for this to work.

You create space by doing things that mark out the boundary of the space you are giving yourself. You hold space by doing what it takes to police that boundary. 

This is where people tend to fail with holding space and having boundaries. You expect other people to hold them for you.

They won’t.

HOLDING the boundary is YOUR job.

HOLDING the space is YOUR job.

You can’t just make the decision, state what you are doing, and be done. You need to be ACTIVELY HOLDING space.

Love Yourself Enough to Walk Away

Be Brave. Loving yourself will bring the greatest revolution in your life. 

Because it doesn’t matter what people think people are going to have their own opinions. Fall fast and make a lot of mistakes. And because the more mistakes you make, right now, you’re going to learn from every single one of them. And sometimes you’re even going to learn in the process. And that process is so beautiful. And take advantage of all of those opportunities that come your way. Don’t be afraid to fail, because failure just means feedback and feedback just means it’s one more stepping stone on your journey.

Strengthen Your Beliefs

  • Ask yourself what the experience has taught you?
  • What lesson are you taking away from this experience? 
  • How am I more of the person I want to be because of it now?
  • Have my negative feelings about the encounter limited my ability to feel gratitude in the time since it happened or stopped it?
  • Has a personal barrier replaced the experience that previously stopped me from feeling grateful?

Note, the purpose is not to relive the past, but to get a fresh perspective on it. Only rehearsing a troubling activity makes us feel worse about it. That is why rarely has catharsis been successful. Emotional venting does not generate improvement without corresponding insight. If you are willing to take a new, redemptive outlook on it, no amount of writing about the incident can help. This is a privilege that thankful individuals have, and it is an ability that can be mastered by everyone.

The ability to process tough times through a grateful lens does not mean denying negativity. It is not a type of gladiology that is superficial. Instead, it means recognising the strength that you have to turn an obstacle into a chance. It implies reframing a loss into a future gain, recasting negativity for appreciation into constructive networks.

Neeta Bhusan’s journey is inspiring to the soul. Her story will make you appreciate your journey till now. Catch her speaking on the xMonks Drive Podcast.

About the Speaker: Neeta Bhusan

Neeta Bhusan is a well-known emotional health advocate championing emotional and mental health. She encourages other entrepreneurs and gamechangers to do the same. She left her traditional conventional path as a brick and mortar cosmetic dentist, with a massively growing practice to chart something entirely new. She is now a mentor to leaders, startup founders, impact drivers, and wellness based entrepreneurs. 

She has written a couple of best-selling books around Emotional GRIT, and the power of your stories, to truly help and establish self-awareness and discover who you are truly meant to be in terms of leadership, your business dreams & desires, and helping you build an ecosystem out of it through your next chapter. 

She is the co-founder at the Global GRIT Institute along with her partner Ajit Nawalkha. Together they consult people and provide a greater message of their living in the next chapter of their business and life.

Tune into more conversations

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Frequently asked questions

Why does one need to be grateful?

Being grateful has many advantages. This whole concept of being grateful to everyone and everything seems to us to be unrealistic initially. We just want to be grateful for the things that make us “happier” that seem to feel good, but what we need to do is switch from the notion of being better to being true, or improving ourselves.

Why is it important to love yourself?

To love yourself is important because it builds trust that you can achieve your goals and confront any issue that crosses your path. Be fearless. Loving yourself will bring your life’s greatest revolution.

How to feel grateful?

Gratitude is a comforting feeling of compassion to the world, or to particular individuals. The person who feels gratitude is grateful for whatever they have, and is not frantically looking for even more.

How to strengthen one’s beliefs?

 One can strengthen their belief by asking these questions to oneself: 

  •  Question yourself what you’ve been taught by experience?
  • What experience from this encounter are you going to take away?
  • How will I be more of the individual I would like to be now because of it?
  • Have my negative emotions about the experience restricted my ability to feel appreciation in the time since or hindered it?
  • Has the experience which previously prevented me from feeling thankful replaced a personal barrier?

What is the true meaning of life experience?

It can simply be said that the information and expertise obtained through life is one’s life experience.